We have had Asa with us about 2.5 weeks now. For the most part a very sweet compliant boy. But when he does want his way, he can make it known. We haven't chosen to fight too many of those battles just yet. We are trying to turn every situation so that we get to say Yes to him. A few times it has had to be NO and we have seen his temper.
Our new/old battle. Standing on the furniture. It is complicated with our three year old who has gotten into a terrible habit of doing this and knows that it is wrong. And since he knows it is against the rules, he gets a consequence every time I catch him standing or running on the furniture. Now, Asa has begun standing and climbing on the furniture like he has seen Ezra do so.
In Asa's orphanage the other children were disciplined when they misbehaved, but reports from nannies, the director and the psychologist told us that Asa was never disciplined for these things. He basically got away with doing whatever he wanted to do.
So, how do you deal this particular behavior at this point with Asa? He needs to know that he is not an exception to the rules in our home. Ezra also needs to know this. But the consequence we would give to Ezra is not appropriate for Asa because of language and his being so very new to our family. Just a few minutes ago I found them both standing on the couch. Ezra immediately sat down when he saw me. Asa just does what I am sure he did in the orphanage, he looked me in the eye and laughed.
Yeah, that's not gonna fly. He knows he is not to stand. I have explained it. I told him to sit down. He halfway sat down. It was on his terms totally. I showed him how I needed him to sit and he told me NO and went right back to the position I had just corrected. It turns into me putting him on the floor and saying, "If you can't sit correctly, you can't be on the couch." I am sure he didn't understand one word of that.
I am sure this would not be a fight I would fight IF I didn't have a three year old brother looking on.
So, help me here.....ideas, thoughts, whatever you got...
I am such a novice at this topic, and given the tantrums that took place at my house today I'm not sure I should be handing out ideas on parenting. BUT, what if you correct the behavior by showing and telling him he needs to sit, and then try to immediately redirect to a different activity before he has a chance to test you again with the behavior? I agree you can't ignore it with Ezra looking on.
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